Do You Want Me To Kiss You?

“Do you want me to kiss you, little fool? Ha. Ha.”

“No”   offering Opa Johan her cheeks.

October 2012

Where She Is, There’s Heaven

“I gladly, happily would honey-moon even to hell with my lover.” 

Then Opa Johan whispered to me: “What’s a honey-moon to Bali, Hawaii, Virgin Islands, ...? That’s for petty lovers. Were her lover unable to afford to buy her such a grand honey-moon she would divorce, leave him or cancel her marriage. Ha. Ha.”

“Not so mine, she would stay. Where she is, there’s heaven” said Opa Johan.

December 2012

Would You Like To Punish Me?

"Would you like to punish me for all the wrongs I did to You?
How many kisses do you want?"

So said Opa Johan to his wife.

January 2013

Opa Johan’s Special Birthday Present

Just guess, what’s so nice, so special when we were watching the musical play.

... ?

It’s not the play, I didn’t care for the play but that’s you sitting beside me,  eating together unnoticed, - there were no spectators behind us, beside us – eating your biscuits, silently in the dark but unfortunately, I forgot to steal me a kiss. Ha. Ha.

This was my special birthday present, more than a picnic, more than young lovers dining in a five star restaurant, you little fool?

That was what Opa Johan told his wife.

Did you know what ‘opa’ means? ‘Granddad’, but he could be a ‘grand-granddad’ by now. They were as young as ever, sitting, eating together just some biscuits secretly, - what a joy it was to have no one other to share - in a dark corner of the theater? That was like heaven.

February 2013

Where’s Your Courage?

You say, you, men are braver, stronger than us. Where is your courage, were you, men, to bear children? How would that feel? Did that ever occur to you, you blockhead. Ha. Ha. So teased Opa Johan’s wife in return.

March 2013

God Told Me So

She remembered her friend, a member of her choir saying not long ago that she had no money to pay her share of the taxi costs, should they go together to visit one of their choir members who had an attack of stroke, at the hospital. Then later, she, the wife of Opa Johan, secretly pressed some money into her hand.

“What is that for?” she asked.

“That’s for you.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. God told me so.”
So she playfully said to cover her goodness and free her friend from any moral obligation.

April 2013

May We Not Meet Again

“Thank you, Good bye” she said to the nurses, who nursed her during her illness in the hospital. “Till, eh ... ‘semoga engga ketemu lagi’, may we not meet again.”  So said the wife of Opa Johan laughing when she left.

May 2013

Don’t Lie

“Don’t lie, you’re a pastor. Your sin would count, weigh a hundred times before God. Ha. Ha.”  So said the wife of Opa Johan. I don’t know what it’s all about. She’s so smart. 

June 2013 

Except My Lover Is With Me

“What do I care of visits when I’m sick? Except my lover is with me. Can’t you feel, understand? I.e. as long as you don’t become an awful, dutiful wife, you stupid little fool. Ha. Ha.” So said Opa Johan.

July 2013

Can I Help It?

How can I love someone, I do not love?

How can I not love someone, I do love?

Can I help it? Can you forbid it?

So don’t vow, promise as you can’t keep them, except you want to become a dutiful husband. So I said to myself.

What’s the use  of being a faithful husband and wife even for life then, founded on duty, decency, vows, laws, instead of loving each other

I could love almost any woman at long last. Ha. Ha. Aren’t they each one very wonderful? But were there some women not wonderful, I am to blame, I am too stupid, blind to see.  So don’t you be jealous, you little fool,  said Opa Johan to his wife.

July 2013

You Are Just A Lucky Little Fool

I said, I could love almost any woman at long last and almost any woman could love me at long last. They certainly are wonderful women, each one. You’re just a lucky little fool. I’ve not the chance to know them that long. Ha. Ha. So said Opa Johan to his wife.

July 2013

Quarrels Of Old Age

“Why are you so angry when I can’t get what you’re saying, you devil. Am I angry when you don’t grasp what I’m saying?”

“No. You never got angry. Ha. Ha.” so said his wife.

She’s such a  dear little devil, though but Opa Johan didn’t say it.

September 2013

Ailments, Troubles Of Old Age

"What’s a million dollars? A gift for the poor. Give me brains,  eyes, ears, arms, legs, ... that’s what I call a gift.” Something like that I said then, do you remember? And now I give myself a gift since I got back my legs as they do not hurt me anymore when I walk.

For many years, I’ve tried a lot, but it was in vain, you know? Only by chance, as I bow as low I can and then stand upright again, was I surprised, so happy. there was almost no pain and can I walk normal, not bend again.

Now, before they would hurt, I practice bowing and standing upright, anytime, anywhere, before I start walking. It doesn’t take a minute. I don’t wait till the pain returns, just as I exercized regularly and not wait till my asthma attacks me.

It costs me nothing except not to be reluctant, ashamed to do it. Besides I don’t dismiss my other exercizes.

So now, congratulate me, your husband. Don’t you be stressed anymore seeing me walking bend, you big, stupid pig, fool. Ha. Ha. So said Opa Johan.

September 2013

Your Kiss, That’s Something

What’s “Happy New Year, Merry Christmas, Happy Birthday?” Nothing. Just words. Your kiss, that’s something. Ha. Ha. So e mailed Opa Johan his lovely granddaughter.

January 2014

You’re Very Delicious Eating

“I don’t want them to be punished in jail. I want to repay them for what they did to me, to us and throw them with a chemical acid also to their bodies and faces.” So said one of the victims on the bus in Jakarta recently.

“Ask us first, were the death sentence ought to, should be abolished.” So said the murdered.

And I thought of the millions of cows, oxen, goats, pigs, chickens, ducks, ... that were slaughtered. “What punishment do you deserve, you wicked man, for what you did to us. What were our wrongs?”

“Ha. Ha. Your wrongs were that you’re very delicious eating.” So said Opa Johan to himself.

October 2013 

He Is Just A Man

I’m very honored to have dinner with the president. So a woman proudly showed me the photo. Aren’t you awed, you fool? It then occurred to me that he is just a man despite his rank, achievements, honors, not a God. Ha. Ha.

So said opa Johan to his wife.

December 2013

What’s The Use Of Having A Wife?

“Just peel your mango yourself. Learn and don’t be so lazy.”

“Well, What’s the use, profit of having a wife then?” So said opa Johan.

November 2009

Good News

“The defeater of Federer in the Wimbledon, is now punished by being defeated also. Ha. Ha. How happy am I.” So told Opa Johan’s wife her husband. 

June 2013 

Delightful Forgetfulness Of Old Age

“Do you want some ice cream? I’ll take a spoon for you.”

                          ***

“Where is the ice cream? There was a lot in the box, yesterday in our fridge.”

“I don’t know? Then our son must have eaten it. Who else?”

But as I returned disappointed to the table, how happy I was, as there it was just beside my plate.

“Who put it there?”

“You, but forgot when you went away to  take a spoon for me, you blockhead.”

“What a delightful forgetfulness, you little fool. Ha. Ha. Let us enjoy.” So said Opa Johan to his wife. 

October 2013

Beauty, Happiness, Bliss

A paradise is not only found in Bali, Raja Ampat, ... said Opa Johan.

Beauty is not only found in a concert hall, ..., said the Choir Conductor.

Beauty, happiness, bliss is not only found in heaven, said Pak Arif.

So now you can always gladden yourself, not repent, even have you never visited Raja Ampat, the Carnegie Hall of Fame, the Louvre museum, read Shakespeare or traveled to heaven, unless you’re a fool. Ha. Ha. 

May 2014

What A Revelation

I watched intently. Who is that man playing Wawringka in the tennis semi final in Monte Carlo recently? And I guess to my surprise that he must be Jesus, not Ferrer. What a revelation. Ha. Ha.

So e mailed Opa Johan his sons and daughters.

Then one of his sons e mailed:

Sure, dad. Jesus could play tennis, badminton, angklung, visit the disco. He certainly could play, laugh, enjoy, love, suffer, cry, feel, ... as we feel, live.

April 2014

As True As A Dog To Its Master

“Look, Piggy is so sweet, she follows me into my room, happily welcomes me home. She’s so true.” So said Opa Johan to his wife.

“So, then marry  your dog,” she said. “Can she sew your buttons, put medicine on your wounded head, cook your food, ... you fool?”

“Ha. Ha. ... “ trying to suppress his laughter till he almost choked. “She’s such a smart little fool.”   

February 2014

Success Is Only In Your Eyes

Every time I’m disappointed, as I thought of the roads to brilliant, dazzling success, I remind, whisper to myself:

“Success is only in your eyes, not in the eyes of the world. Didn’t you say so? You certainly are successful, didn’t you create your own beautiful thoughts? They are your treasures, riches.”

                                              ***

“What? You, Mr. Chew” said Opa Johan, “you certainly are successful as I think of the greatest honor that lovely angels, so unbelievable,  like, love, follow a scarecrow like you. Ha. ha.” 

March 2014

Opa Johan

There he is, his wife, his grandchildren, his travels, his adventures, his memories, his thoughts, his philosophy, ... 

Fondle Name

Did you know why Opa Johan teased,  ridiculed his wife and me?

Love should be recognized, felt, known, be obvious as your dog's, without saying “I love you, or you mother, or you father, or you brother, or you sister, or you son, or you daughter,"  he argued. And he teased his wife as “you, little fool”, instead of saying “my darling, my sweetheart”. That’s his cuddle, fondle name for her. He would never acknowledge, admit that he loves her.

He also would never acknowledge, he would deny he liked my thoughts, that’s why he ridiculed me, the scoundrel. Ha. Ha.

February 2013